Threeknotes S14 Ep9 (11th to 29th July‘22)
CAVEAT: notes that I wrote around the 29th but didn’t publish as they were incomplete and then I went on holiday so they are now very out of date.
There’s lots of change happening at work and it’s been colouring how I’ve been feeling. I’ve been at times totally optimistic and others very wary or grumpy. The ground feels viscous, like a swimming pool full of custard, if you run over the thing it might be ok but if you stay still you will sink into it.
I know that change brings opportunity but it still feels hard.
My boss, Dan, is leaving after being in the organisation for 13 years and setting up the team I currently sit in. Dan is one of the main reasons I chose to join Social Finance and he’s been so supportive and such a good champion of mine since I joined that I’m not sure where this leaves me. This sounds pretty self-centred, but I am not one to underestimate the value of someone who will stick their neck out for you. Plus it’s just been nice to join an organisation and have someone who just wants to talk about things they’re interested in, ideas and stuff, I really appreciate that. I also think I’m being pretty grumpy with Dan as a result of this which is silly and I’m trying really hard not to just be a total pain in the arse in his last few weeks.
On top of that my colleague Nick is leaving. We joined at the same time and in some ways this has knocked me more than Dan going partly because it made me question the path I was on in direct comparison, and made me ask if I was doing enough or pushing myself enough. It’s not like Nick and I have worked together too much, but he’s a really nice colleague and it was good to start together and compare notes about how we are getting on.
In reality I know both are going off to do exciting things and this isn’t about me, but also, my brain loves to make everything about me. So.
I’m now working on two projects. The first is not something in my wheelhouse… or at least it’s something I haven’t done before in that it’s a data analysis and visualisation piece… or at least the first part is a visualisation piece but the actual ambition for the work is much more than that and has a lot of different moving parts and different interests and will need a lot of brokering and negotiation to get right.
I’ve been finding it hard to work out how to pull someone else’s vision and ambition for something into the real-world based on a limited understanding of all those different parts. So in reaction to that I’ve basically decided to get the first thing done as quickly and straightforwardly as possible, so that I can get it into a handoverable state, and then concentrate more on setting the direction of those moving parts.
As I write this I think it’s probably not all that useful or helpful for anyone else. I guess what I’m saying is that we deliver digital and data projects into a complex space (social care) and those projects are small and granular, making them of limited value unless we work out some general principles for making sure they can be impactful and drive positive behaviours in the future. They’re of limited value unless (or until) they start being useful to more people, so I need to think about connections, and needs, and scale.
My other project is on the Government’s Changing Futures programme, where I’ll be leading the data support strand of the work.
And what else?
- We had the hottest days on record, which was pretty scary, but which also gave me the first cluster migraine I’ve had in some time, with 3 migraines over 3 the three hottest days. I was disappointed that it broke my impressive no migraine streak after starting to take magnesium, but also recovered relatively quickly.
- I had a long weekend and stopped in Bath before heading to an epic 40th birthday outside Cardiff. I ate lots of lovely food and got to meet Nour for brunch too which was lovely.
- I’ve been watching Only Murderers in the Building which is silly and funny and charming.
- I went to see the Minions movie in the cinema.
